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Tuesday, July 4
Monday, July 3
English is a crazy language
Not claiming the credit for this, found it whilst surfing:
Let's face it -- English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.
We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one loose tooth, 2 leese teeth? One index, 2 indices?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend, that you comb through annals of history but not a single annal? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
If teachers taught, why didn't preacher praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? If you wrote a letter, perhaps you bote your tongue?
Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo or a truck by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? Park on driveways and drive on parkways? Lift a thumb to thumb a lift? Table a plan in order to plan a table?
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and wise guy are opposites? How can overlook and oversee be opposites, while quite a lot and quite a few are alike? How can a person be "pretty ugly?"
How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another. Have you noticed that we talk about certain things only when they are absent?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which an alarm clock goes off by going on. Why is "crazy man" an insult, while to insert a comma and say "crazy, man!" is a compliment
English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race (which, of course, isn't a race at all). That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible. And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it.
Let's face it -- English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.
We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one loose tooth, 2 leese teeth? One index, 2 indices?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend, that you comb through annals of history but not a single annal? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
If teachers taught, why didn't preacher praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? If you wrote a letter, perhaps you bote your tongue?
Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo or a truck by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? Park on driveways and drive on parkways? Lift a thumb to thumb a lift? Table a plan in order to plan a table?
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and wise guy are opposites? How can overlook and oversee be opposites, while quite a lot and quite a few are alike? How can a person be "pretty ugly?"
How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another. Have you noticed that we talk about certain things only when they are absent?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which an alarm clock goes off by going on. Why is "crazy man" an insult, while to insert a comma and say "crazy, man!" is a compliment
English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race (which, of course, isn't a race at all). That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible. And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it.
Sunday, July 2
England just don't do penalties
His face tells the whole story...
The quarter finals are over, and not surprisingly England have gone out on penalties. As Lampard and Gerrard stepped up to convert their penalties you would bet your life on the back of the net bulging...but alas...the curse of England's penalty taking will not go away!
Whats even more surprising is that the player you'd least expect to convert one does so, that being Owen Hargreaves, and he's not even english!
Disappointment all around, but what makes things even worse are the antics of the Portuguese squad, and in particular Ronaldo. As a Man Utd fan, all i can say is that i'm ashamed that a player like that wears the red shirt of united...utter disgrace.
Was a poor performance by both teams, with england only bothering to play once the red card came, so in the end maybe penalties was a fair result
France, how they've got this far i have no idea. Puts a new meaning to the "slow tortoise wins the race"!
With Sven gone (i still think why only four strikers sven, why WHY?!) and Becks stepping down, lets hope this new era will bring much more success (not holding my breath when it comes to penalties though)
Well, at least Andy Murray can do some pride for Britain, had a wiked game against A.Roddick, winning in straight sets. (still no idea why he keeps doing that thing with his hand, its like he thinks he's got a windscreen in front of his face and keeps wiping it to see!meh)
Speaking of disappointments: the England cricket team, injuries or no injuries, are a joke..5-0 whitewash to S.Lanka (its hard to believe that they won the last Ashes)...not even worth going into.
Just for the record i don't support the england cricket or football teams (but then again i don't support any other international team, so why not the country i'm in right now) ...so its not that disappointing for me, but still a disappointment nonetheless.
Ah well, with the good weather and 3 months hols of doing absolutely nothing...its all good! :)
Peace
Whats even more surprising is that the player you'd least expect to convert one does so, that being Owen Hargreaves, and he's not even english!
Disappointment all around, but what makes things even worse are the antics of the Portuguese squad, and in particular Ronaldo. As a Man Utd fan, all i can say is that i'm ashamed that a player like that wears the red shirt of united...utter disgrace.
Was a poor performance by both teams, with england only bothering to play once the red card came, so in the end maybe penalties was a fair result
France, how they've got this far i have no idea. Puts a new meaning to the "slow tortoise wins the race"!
With Sven gone (i still think why only four strikers sven, why WHY?!) and Becks stepping down, lets hope this new era will bring much more success (not holding my breath when it comes to penalties though)
Well, at least Andy Murray can do some pride for Britain, had a wiked game against A.Roddick, winning in straight sets. (still no idea why he keeps doing that thing with his hand, its like he thinks he's got a windscreen in front of his face and keeps wiping it to see!meh)
Speaking of disappointments: the England cricket team, injuries or no injuries, are a joke..5-0 whitewash to S.Lanka (its hard to believe that they won the last Ashes)...not even worth going into.
Just for the record i don't support the england cricket or football teams (but then again i don't support any other international team, so why not the country i'm in right now) ...so its not that disappointing for me, but still a disappointment nonetheless.
Ah well, with the good weather and 3 months hols of doing absolutely nothing...its all good! :)
Peace
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